


the one who loves must share the fate of the one he loves

by lanyon



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bucky's emotional immaturity, Friends to Lovers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-26
Updated: 2013-11-26
Packaged: 2018-01-02 16:15:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1058905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lanyon/pseuds/lanyon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky would pick up the pieces if Steve was actually broken.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the one who loves must share the fate of the one he loves

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Fair Copy](https://archiveofourown.org/works/930402) by [lanyon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lanyon/pseuds/lanyon). 



> +Title from Bulgakov's _The Master and Margarita_. Consider this fair warning for pretentious use of Russian literature (Bulgakov and Solzhenitsyn).  
>  +Yes, there is mention of previous Steve/Tony in this. No, Bucky is not particularly gracious about it. The end pairing is Bucky/Steve.

Steve breaks up with Tony and Bucky would do anything to make Steve feel better except that he thinks that Steve’s not that sad. Tony gets back together with Pepper and Steve doesn’t say much apart from something about Pepper being a wonderful woman. 

Bucky would pick up the pieces but there are no pieces; he’s seen Steve fragmented and broken in the past and he’s longed to put him back together but here, now, Steve is whole.

Bucky would pick up the pieces.

.

Steve moves back to his Williamsburg apartment and Bucky makes room for him. He curls up at one end of the couch and sometimes Clint calls in and drags him out drinking. They play shooting games and Natasha mocks their choice of bar and Clint tells her she’s probably never heard of it. Bucky comes home, weaving along Union Avenue, and the light is on over the front door and Steve is waiting up. 

.

Bucky likes to read the Russians; the ones who fought and died in duels, who were sent to gulags and death, who made poetry of a language that hurt him. 

“ _But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?_ ”

Natasha pokes at him with a sock-clad toe. “Reading Solzhenitsyn,” she says, “is a symptom of your -”

“-my?”

“-his-?

“Steve,” says Bucky, tucking his feet under his body and shivering slightly. 

“Are you cold?” asks Steve. 

“I have to go,” says Natasha. She pokes at Bucky again. 

.

Bucky would pick up the pieces. 

They go for long runs, through Williamsburg, to Greenpoint, to Bedford–Stuyvesant, and back again. They try vegan donuts and microbrews and expensive coffee. They laugh and sweat and Bucky likes the expression on Steve’s face when Bucky wears Steve’s old sweatpants (the ones that are worn and frayed at the knees and the crotch).

“You need a boyfriend,” he says. 

Steve stops dead. “I don’t need a man to complete me,” he says and no one knows better than Bucky what a comedian this man can be. “Why do I need a boyfriend?”

Bucky leans against a streetlamp. “So they’ll stop talking about the mystery brunette.”

“Who’s ‘they’?” asks Steve and Bucky knows that he is no great mystery to Steve.

.

It breaks Bucky’s heart when Steve asks if he minds. 

“I didn’t mind when you were giving it to the Stark kid,” says Bucky. “Why would I mind now that you’re not?” 

Steve raises an eyebrow.

“I mean,” says Bucky, with all due haste. “I only mind if you’re not happy.”

“I’m not _sad_ ,” says Steve. 

“I could have told you that, pal.”

.

“ _What would your good do if evil didn't exist, and what would the earth look like if all the shadows disappeared?_ ”

“No, James.”

.

Bucky kisses Steve one night when the light is on over the front door and Steve is waiting up.

“I wasn’t waiting,” says Bucky. “For you to end things with Stark.” 

Steve looks startled. “I never thought you were. Waiting, I mean. For me.”

Bucky laughs and claps Steve on the shoulder. “Atta boy.”

Bucky’s always been waiting. 

Buck would pick up the pieces.

.

When Captain America comes out as gay, he gets hate mail. He says he doesn’t care because, for every death threat and insult, he gets a message of support or a message of thanks. 

“Like I said you would, right?” says Bucky. He nudges Steve’s shoulder with his. “I said you’d make it right. There are kids not dying because of you.”

Steve smiles and nods but his smile’s a bit tight and his shoulders are hunched. If Bucky could, he’d take out every single bastard who said something bad to or about Steve. 

Some things never change. 

“Let’s go for a run.”

“Bucky, it’s midnight.”

It’s not a no. They run. They laugh. They stop in a diner that’s anything but hipster and drink ice-cold water and too-hot coffee. 

“See, Steve,” says Bucky. “You’re gonna be okay.”

Steve quirks a smile and it’s warm and relaxed. “You figure?”

“Well,” says Bucky and he leans across the table and touches his lips to the corner of Steve’s mouth, right where that smile begins. “Obviously."

Steve sits back, leaning far away from Bucky, with his hands on the table between them and his smile is something broader now, and amused.

“You’re doing nothing to help those mystery brunette rumours, buddy.” 

.

Bucky doesn’t know what to do. He could fake it and he’s tempted to do so; he could front like a motherfucker and pretend that he has the first clue what to do.

“It’s okay, Buck,” says Steve and Bucky can hear him laughing, even though Bucky’s got his head hidden under a couple of pillows. “It’s okay. It’s not like you’ve exactly had the chance to, ah, explore?”

Steve curves his hand around the back of Bucky’s thigh, fingers gliding up the inner aspect and higher and higher.

“It’s okay, Buck,” says Steve, again. “If you don’t want to-”

Bucky rolls over, scattering the pillows. “Oh, I want to. I’ll show you just how much I want to-” He sits up and they’re kissing, sudden and bruising. 

.

“I love you,” he says, grumpily. “I mean, I really fucking do.”

Steve turns to him and smiles, brighter than sunshine and neon lights and arc reactors.

“What,” says Bucky. His cheeks are burning. “Ain’t like no one’s told you that before.”

“My mother,” says Steve. 

“Well, fuck.”

.

“You sure moved fast,” says Stark, when a briefing is over and the world is saved. 

“How’s Pepper?” asks Bucky. 

He’s not proud. 

.

Steve’s asleep. Saving the world takes its toll, even on super soldiers. Bucky lifts the covers and Steve murmurs. 

.

“You’re right,” whispers Bucky. “I never had the chance to explore.”

Steve guides Bucky’s hand down between his legs. 

“Explore,” he says. “I don’t mind. It won’t hurt.”

“Not exactly a compelling argument, pal.”

“I want you to,” says Steve. He’s raising himself up on his elbows and his eyes are fixed on Bucky’s. “You’ll make it good.”

Bucky’s read a little and watched a little. He has some idea of what to do but he’s not expecting Steve to make those kinds of sounds. Steve’s legs drop open wider and Bucky uses his metal fingers and Steve, oh. Steve Rogers is bearing down on them like it’s all he’s ever wanted. 

“Is it all you’ve ever wanted?” Bucky asks. 

“Keep going,” says Steve. “More,” says Steve. “Then I’ll tell you - oh-”

Bucky’s hands are shaking, yes, even the metal one, the precision Stark Industries creation. He rolls on a condom and uses too much lube and pushes into Steve, who’s moaning now, louder and louder, and Bucky's dick has never been this hard. 

“Shit,” says Bucky, blinking sweat out of his eyes. “ _Shit._.” 

No one ever said he was articulate.

.

He likes to take his shirt off after long runs. He thinks Steve likes it, too.

.

Steve cups Bucky’s chin. It’s winter and midnight and their local diner is empty. Steve cups Bucky’s chin and kisses him sweetly. 

“It’s all I’ve ever wanted,” he murmurs. 

It’s ice-cold water and too-hot coffee and smiling kisses. It’s Tony Stark’s good grace and sense of humour when he upgrades Bucky’s arm and asks if he wants to know where this hand has been. 

“You know, pal,” says Bucky, with the greatest satisfaction. “You know.”


End file.
